the 1st thought that came to mind as i watched the news this morn is: Pray for Thailand.
political turmoil has set the country in divisions. words i thought would forever RIP in history textbooks resurfaced. COUP. oh my...the last time i saw this word was when i studied the french revolution in JC. u know how long ago was the French revolution?
pray for thailand k.
now for happier news.
I'll see 1 more family member in heaven!!! COOL! I read my cousin's blog yest and knew that she wanted to receive Christ!!! i'm so happy for her!!! and now i am waiting...for the rest of the family to be saved! God truly answers prayers. My sis....my cousin...and many more!!!
i always look forward to cell...be it this present cell or the previous cells. and this week... Wan Jun and Zhiwei will be leading worship! how great right! they are so willing to serve and take that leap of faith cos they are quite new in this. and Zhiwei just joined CAMY!!! i marvel at his servant attitude. Though new to our cell, i've seen him make efforts to be part of it, to contribute and to get to know the rest better. wow. true fellowship would take place bcos of people like him, who would step out to make the difference. wow. and Wan Jun met me on Mon to discuss the songs to do for worship. and i thought we had a little worship session in the discussion itself! She gladly avail herself to play the guitar.. and i am just so glad...which means i can sit behind and shake legs! ha...nah...not that relac la. hee...anyhow, i am just glad, healthy n happy.....lalala....God is great!
Sing his praise!
Fills the earth, fills the heavens!
since working at deli, TLL and leading a cell group have taught me a lot about relationships. btw colleagues, friends, peers, superiors, new staff, parents, teachers and customers. wow..come to think of it, i do interact with a lot of pple. hmmm...and i have made new friends! a couple from TLL (my full time job) and new people who joined our church whose in my cell! so exciting. i am so happy for these friendships bcos i believe God is networking me to different different people..so that i can be a better person...i think. and i believe i have the gift of friendliness or call it warmth? cos pple seem to naturally open up to me very fast and confide in me. They say i'm a approachable, truthful and friendly person. hmmm... and i believe it is a gift from God. i dont possess this friendly nature, but God gave me or made me this way so that He could use me. i dunno what others find in me that makes them wanna trust me with their problems, but i believe God brought them to me for a purpose. and i hope i will accomplish that purpose and not miss the opportunity to speak life to any soul. i'm grateful for the friendships God has placed in my life. althou some of them have given me headaches and heartache...but nonetheless...i learnt something.i have a sudden desire to want to learn the guitar!!! ever since i plucked a few chords on my colleague's guitar, i have been harbouring the thought of going for lessons. Wallis recommended Believers' Music which i suppose is very good. hmmm...if i know how to play, i can play in cell too. hmmm...and after playing the guitar that day, i felt like i was made to play it!!! haha...nah. i guess i just like the feeling of being able to play the guitar. hmmm...i will seriously consider learning it man.i'm so excited!!! Today the new guy in my cell signed up for CAMY!!! cool right? was his first time attending our YA service!!! WOW! now i guess almost everyone in my cell is serving in one way or another in the ministry! COOL!! and as the leader, i really feel SMALL now man!! ha...but it is good. I would rather they OUTSHINE me. cos then will i be proud to be their leader. ha. i'm egoistic. hee... i think, a leader should not be the overpowering one. Rather he should be the one who EMPOWERS. Amen?Just like Jesus who sent out the 12. He empowered them. and to be empowered by God, we have to be broken by Him.A seed cannot grow unless it falls to the ground and dies.
if there is one person i could possibly hate a lot, it is U. i guess i always step on ur foot. and even when i think i have not, u think that i had. my defense would be nothing in the sight of all ur nasty worrds. so, if there is one person i could possibly hate, it is U. for all u have done, i could very possibly hate u. i dont think u are a nasty person. i guess u are just someone who have desensitised all ur senses and emotions to become someone other than ur real self. u devoid urself of any feelings that might make u more vunerable, more humane. u avoid a greater being who tells u what u need. it is as if u dont give a damn about anything, not even urself.
i question myself bcos of what u do.
went through some down moments recently which made me think hard about the person i am and the God i serve. some really difficult questions came to mind. i couldnt understand why things happened the way they do. and i asked this bcos i believe all things happen for a purpose. hmmm...and i still cannot figure them out! its frustrating.
i often have people say nice things about me...and also nasty things. sometimes i could not understand why i was the recipient of such mean things. am i a such a mean person that one had to resort to using such degrading and mean words? i often asked myself. it hurts when someone says such mean things about u. yet i could do nothing. i mean what could i possibly do? draw up a defense? i have learnt to break down all my defense, cos i know defenses are built up by pride and ego. so, hurt i should feel when i forgo pride and ego. and when i 'm down on my knees hurting, my prayer is often "Lord help me see what u see. help me forgive." and for those i have hurt, "Lord forgive me."
how often have i come to ur throne of grace with tears
knocking at heaven's door
seeking for answers
yet found none
but u gave me ur assurance and ur peace
To trust u
That u know
to follow u
to keep doing good
to cling on
to ur word
to rely on
ur grace.
even if the sky falls today
i'll know u'll be here
to hold me.
even if the sky falls today
i'll know u'll hold me.
so let the sky fall.
each time i run astray, i break God's heart. each time i run astray, i break God's heart.
work has been hectic for the past 2 weeks. tons of backlog to clear. now, finally "ALL COASTS CLEAR." hmmm...hopefully work will be back to normal from today onwards. i guess this period of my life i NEED to re-prioritise my priorites. things which used to take up much of my time are perhaps not as important now. Things whcih i did not spend much time on, NEEDS my much attention now. THINGS HAVE ALWAYS BEEN CHANGING. how can i remain stagnant?
so excited about the direction that the YA ministry is movin, under the leadership of Ps Kieran. He moves very fast, we have to catch up! but i believe all this urgency and drastic changes are necessary for us to advance to another level, as a whole ministry. The vision has been cast. There lies the need for labourers to reap the harvest. quantity and quality are both important. It is all part of redeeming OUR generation for ETERNITY. JeSuS SaVeS SoUlS.
i want to make a commitment to spend more time with my family. i wanna place them above friends, above work, above church even. Because i realise if i fail to be the light in the family, how can i be the light of this world? If i do not honour my father and mother, how can i begin to love others? i want to start praying for my family. i wish to be their spiritual gateway to God. I want to be the one to plant the seeds. This is a commitment. Please keep me in prayers. Thanks. =)
I wanna be a history maker in this land......!!!!
just had the first cell mtg at my place a few hours ago. I led worship while Sis Ervina led word. A total of 9 people attended... of which all the confirmed members turned up! what surprised me the most was actually the fact that most of them arrived before time at the mrt. it was surprising cos i expected some pple to be late, in fact i expected most to be late. and i was on time...so wehn i saw them, thou i was punctual, i was very paiseh la. and then all of us walked to my home...
i dunno how other new cell leaders might feel but i feel weird leading a group of people to my house, esp walking a 10mins walk with them. i feel a great sense of responsibility being the person in front. it is like a burden that i have to carry through. it is not neccessarily in a negative way. i view it as a challenge, a mounding process, a chance to learn to be a servant of God.
to lead is to serve.
i am very encouraged by my cell tonight. i am glad for the numbers that turned up..i am glad for the enthusiastic and light atmosphere. i am thankful that Sis Ervina helped me a lot by leading word. I am exhilarated that my members would want to come for cell again next week.
all in all, i am encouraged by what i see.
and for the things i do not see, i believe in faith it will come to pass.
God will provide.
i really thank God that He gave me the faith to believe in Him.
without faith it is impossible to please God...
yet even Christians may not have the faith to believe God sometimes...
and i find it saddening that some Christians dont even trust God...then who do they trust?
i may not be a good testimony...but in my days as a Christian and believer, i have never seen God fail me, nor forsake me. I have never seen so much love in someone, as the kind given by God. It amazes me still.
sometimes,perhaps,
it only takes that little belief in God, on ur part, that makes all the difference in ur life.
i'm not exaggerating
nor do i want to boast
but all i am today, and the reason for my existence
is due to the fact that God gave
and lives today.
i dun wanna hold on to anything else except You.Lord, i don't deserve what u've done for me.
