disclaimer. disclaimer. disclaimer. haha.I wonder if my recent persistent lethargic-ness has to do with the failure of completing my history assignment on time. I am begining to dread if i am ever going to get it done. man..er...that thought is so disgusting. Hate to come undone. I mean it is so difficult to enjoy urself when u know that there is work that u have not done rite? ya...and i will get it done soon. i will. if not, i wont be able to enjoy myself.
Lord, You take charge of my life once again. help me to face whatever life throws at me, knowing that You will see me through. With the faith you've given me, help me to be bold and hopeful once again, so that i may move on to do the things you've set for me with gladness and willingness. Lord, your will. Nothing else. You hold me Lord. In Jesus's precious name i pray, amen.
been sleeping and sleeping for the past few days. Missing lects, missing cell......hmmm... slackness has creeped in. dear. hope it will die off by tmr. Hopefully. *Cross fingers*
I think i can never understand the letting go part. struggling to let go. It is painful. But another chapter can only begin when it is allowed to end.When there is no love, everything else loses its meaning.
Doesn't it?
Mumblings: I wish i have more interest in subjects outside of Social Work, so that i wont have such a hard time completing my electives modules' assignment. hmm... but being able to read what i am interested in, i shouldn't ask for more. be contented.Compassion?Compassion?
Compassion?
What is that?According to Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English, Compassion means feeling sympathy for people who are sufferring and a desire to help them.Do we have that?Do we cast a second glance at a worn out and tired foreign worker, with dirty boots and BO?Do we still view Indians as abu nei nei?Do we "siam" people who look umkempt, talks to themselves?Do we stare at people with disabilities?Do we sit a liitle away from people with skin diseases?Do we dislike old people?Do we despise in out hearts secretly those who are less smart, less popular from us?Time for reflection ya?Whom did Jesus have compassion on?-people with leprosy-prostitues-tax collectors-persecutors of Christians-fishermen-old and young-the lame-the sick-the deaf-the poor-people who have no or little compassion; us.Don't believe what i say. Read the bible.Jesus replied: Go back and report to John what you hear and see: The blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the good news is preached to the poor.-Matt 11:5
Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and i will give you rest. -Matt 11:28
when he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.-Matt 9:36
Just came back from bowling with Mic, Jess, Wayne and Ryan awhile ago. I think the 5 of us had a great time tonight; although Jess din play as well as she always did. But the most impt thing is not whether who had the highest score but that everyone enjoyed themselves. It was the first time the 5 of us went bowling. Though Wayne was the PRO there, he did not trash us! I guess he purposely did not go all out, so that we all wouldnt look so bad! haha...thou i am the only single there, i din not feel out of place! Thanks to Mic and Jess who did not "zhong se qing you"! I know they would not. That's reassuring to know. So i am not in hurry to get attached! haha.... aiya, that one can man man lai, i am still young rite? no? haha..it's always fun hanging out with people who are so unassuming. humble and caring. Really blessed to have this group of friends to hang out with. all the more we should treasure them rite? Love you guys!!! Muack! haha...-----------------------------
dunno what else to blog on already... oh, read from Su Teck's blog that his brother contracted dengue. Hey pal, is your brother ok now? have kept him in prayer. Dont worry too much. You gotta be strong, the family needs u. Also, take care of ur own health ya! =)
Projs are coming to an end!! Yeah! then it will be exams, then holis, then Christmas, then Mic's bdae, then CNY!!!! Hooray!!! haha...u must be thinking that i am crazy rite? Haha... Hope keeps me alive! haha.
Hmmm... how come it is always such that the more u wanna forget someone, the more u'll think of that someone? I dreamt about him last night. Must be bcos i though about him, shortly before i fell asleep. Why do i always think of him? I know it can never be possible between us, but why is he always in my thoughts? It is unhealthy to think of a person whom i can never love. Yes, it is not good. But i cant help myself....
Perhaps i can't find anyone like him in my life now. maybe that's why i am still missing him. But an impossibility will always be an impossibility. I know. I really do.
I don't wanna fall in love
Till i know your love is true
Cos i need
You to feel the way i do
Nope. It is not SCHOOL.
My second family is none other than "see so often till wanna VOMIT" friend, Jessica Lee Peng Huai's family.
hmmm... know what, sometimes, i think they treat me better than my own family! I know I am greatly blessed to have them. That's how good they are to me.
Like just now when Michelle and I went to Jess's place for steamboat, the ever clumsy me, toppled my rice bowl and soup bowl onto the floor! Gosh, the bowl broke and was scattered all over the floor! While i was still sitting there, not knowing how to begin clearing up, I was actually anticipating that everyone would kinda nag and scold me for being so clumsy.
Instead, everyone got up from their seats and started to pick up the broken pieces. When i turned to look at Jess's mum to see her reaction, the first thing she said to me was " are you hurt?"
At that instance, i probably did not show it, but deep inside i was so touched by that gesture. She did not even scold me, not even did she made any sarcastic or mean remarks. She even reassured the rest that it is ok.
even without this incident, I still thank God for placing this family in my life. Many a times, at the lower points in my life, their home has become my refuge. Jess's mum did not mind the staying overs and inconvenience. She was that nice. Also, when i went Genting with them last year and fell sick throughout my 3 days' stay there, they looked after me day and night. Though i had diarrhea several times every day, they did not even once mention anything about the stink. Gosh, can you believe it?
They are that nice.
and i really thank God for them. I prayed for God's blessings to be upon them. I know that they are not well-off themselves, yet everytime i impose on them, they have always provided for me. They are always so giving. I feel part of their family. It's through them that i really get to appreciate the essence of family warmth and togetherness. Money cant buy me any of that. Never.
You CAN'T buy genuine love.
and God loves us so much that he places people in our lives who loves us, genuinely.
And love makes the world go round doesn't it?
Praise God!
Food for thought: whenever we do something wrong and come before God, what do we suppose God will do? Scold, nag, strike us dead? You really think so? If that is the case, we will all be dead by now. I always wonder at the act of the father in the story of the prodigal son (in the bible). How could the father still hug a son who chose to leave home, a son who was wilful, a son who refused to listen to him? How was it possible that the father have the heart to forgive his son? How was it possible to have so much love for someone who has done something wrong?
It is possible. Our God is a God who does not keep a record of our wrongs. He is a compassionate, kind and loving God. We can never imagine how much love he has for us. We can never measure his love for us, using any of our own devices! His love is that great, that uncomparable, that unconditional.
No matter how far we have walked away from Him
No matter how much evil we've done
No matter how long it'll be before we accept him
No matter how many times we have broken his heart
No matter how many instances we have proven ourselves to be unworthy of His love,
He still loves us.
He still calls us 'my children".
No eye has seen
No ear has heard,
No mind has conceived
what God has prepared for those who love him.
I Cor 2:9
I have been happy. I am happy. and it is such a good feeling to feel happy and to be happy. Note the difference.
I guess it is the joy of the Lord! Amen?
hmmm...i notice it is a trend for me to be misunderstood in my blog. hmmm... i wonder why. Is it bcos i wasn't explicit enough? Or that the readers do not know me well? eh... i guess both. So....the next time you read Serene's blog, esp what may seems depressing to YOU, rem that Serene might not be actually feeling sad when she writes sad posts.... are u wondering how could this discrepancy ever occur? how can it be true? how can Serene blog about sad things yet not be sad?
I'm telling you, Serene can. perhaps you can call that reaching the highest form (zui gao jing jie). haha. Yes.
I do get only things quite fast. I dont like to dwell on sad stuff for long. I guess that's a real precious gift. of cos, I've got a wonderful Saviour. hahaha...also rem that when Serene gets a bit cranky and crappy, means she is happy. Contented. haha.
but then, thanks all for ur concern, your comments. I'm glad u guys "tune" in. Do not hesitate to share ur knowledge here. Be it theological issues (yes, Matt...u've been an encouraging and challenging critic. It's good.), or any thing close to ur heart, or even crap, tell me how are feeling after reading my post also can (like Mr SS aka Miruku, appreciate ur candid remarks). =)
extra note: just got back one of my assignment today, and i got an A!!!! Praise God! I am not happy cos i think i deserved it. I'm happy bcos i know it is God's favour upon me. It was a rather last min work, after doing it, i know that I could have produced a better work, i just didn't think that it would an impressive piece of work. Well, the lecturer did! and well, God did! and sure, God has good taste! oh ok...i am disgressing...too much self-praise here.
Not by (my) might, not by (my) power, but by the Spirit of God.
Walking alone along ECP
On a windless, humid Saturday night
Memories of you, of us,
Keep flooding back
The place where it all began
The place where we said goodbye
Strolling on, I find,
Myself, thinking of you
Thinking that somehow,
I'll bump into you
I walked, I looked, I didn't see
I forgot, they were memories
I can't see, can't hear and can't feel, you anywhere near
But there, inside my mind, you'll always be
A sweet memory
Of us, a beautiful misunderstanding.
I keep thinking what it would be
If I went with my heart , and you with yours
Perhaps, it would be,
A beautiful story.
But when my head took over, that dimished.
i wasn't heartbroken cos i know,
I had made that choice.
But somehow whenever i think of you, of us,
a part of me just can't agree,
That it was just a beautiful memory,
A beautiful misunderstanding.
I never thought "us" would be a possibility
But neither did i think it would be a beautiful memory.
never thought it would be something i would think about,
As i walk alone along ECP.
The place where it all began
The place where we said goodbye
Don't get me wrong
I am not hoping that things will change
I know "us" will forever stay
A beautiful memory,
A beautiful misunderstanding.
A story that had ended before it even started
This i know with all my heart.
Though it was all in the distant past,
But glad "us", to me, had become a beautiful memory
It is not easy,
But somehow i have been taught to remember the happy and not the sad,
Memories that we had.
All along ECP, as memories of you, of us, flooded back
I really wish you are happy,
Blissful with your girl
Though a part of me still aches
A greater part of me just wants you to be happy,
Blissful with your girl.
I have moved on, am moving on
I dont blame anyone
Cos only when the beautiful misunderstanding ends,
Will the beautiful memories start.
And i know as i walk along ECP,
On a windless, humid Saturday night.
All that is of you, of us,
Will always be a beautiful memory,
A beautiful misunderstanding.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
sunset pic taken from:loony-kid.diaryland.com/031114_58.html
eeee? eh..? Charlie angels? Where?
Look no further! there....here!
Yes. Charlie angels = Michelle, Jessica and Serene!
Disclaimer: hey, dont think we are so buay hiao bye k. We dont give ourselves this name. It's given by our ex-colleagues back at John Little. cos hor, they always see the 3 of us, anytime of the day! like super glue like that. but then maybe we pretty rite? if not might as well call us the 3 Muskettes rite? haha...Ahem. ya lor. So we are not BUAY HIAO BYE ok? but then again, i think we are. hee! So look here.. at the Charlie Angels.
Let's see what each Charlie Angel have to say!
From Mic:
"Thanx Sisters for all these time that we have spent together. Our late night chilling out, our scary experiences when we walked home during midnight, our stories sharing, commenting on each other, shopping, ktv session, supper time, working experiences. I believe we have learnt a lot from each other experiences and thoughts. I will cherish our friendship foreva. =)"
From Jess:"hahazz.. i treasure our friendship too n i've never take it for granted all along( serious)..:) Sisters 4ever~ yeah**"
From me:" when is our next chilling out???heee..."
------------------------------------------------------------------------
When it comes to talking about these 2 sisters of mine, i am always filled with fond memories. I guess and many would agree that whenever the 3 of us come together, expect bouts and bouts of laughter!!!, giggling!!!!, embarassing moments!!!!, stupid actions!!!!, spontanteous activities!!!!! and gossips!!!!. in essence, its FUN, FUN and more FUN!
haha...quite a handful huh. =)
It's funny how all 3 of us have reached an understanding of one another that no one can really fathom, what we mean, what we say. and whether we mean what we say. When 3 of us are together, we are like 3 xiao cha bor!
Really blessed to have these 2 sisters by my side, through the ups and the lowest moments in my life. The 2 of them ah, are my bestest confidants as well as my bestest nannies!!! They can really nag like my mother u know?
really. aiyo...and they will like really scold me. like when i spend a lot of money,they will nag and nag. like when i pin my hair (they say very sum pat), like how they keep harping on my single status, they say i am too fussy, keep matchmaking me with whatever guys in my life! phew...
but then, without them, what do i do?
oh, in case u wonder. We do LOVE to look at ourselves. That explains the many shots we take of, ahem, OURSELVES. hee...
Yesterday as i was on the bus, i saw a few stalks of flowers by the roadside. And i thought to myself: If God you, so cared about these thin frail stalks of flowers, showering them with nutrients, rain and sun, surely, you cared much more for me, for us!
Stalks of flowers that no one bothers to appreciate. stalks of flowers which nobody looks after; to prune or to nourish. Stalks of flowers which cannot control their destiny. Stalks of flowers which wither, one day.
But to God, no. To many, flowers are flowers. To you O God, flowers are your creation!
"If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?" -Matt 6:30
Amen. Yes. How much more. How much more you.
been quite dissatisfied with my life recently. and i dunno why. There is nothing really to complain about my present life. But still i am dissatisfied. Why? beats me...
Let's see... perhaps, PERHAPS, PERHAPS, my life would be better if I have;
More single friends?
More things to do?
A God given vision?
Ice-cream everyday?
More shoes?
More favoured in class?
More motivation to do my assignments?
Less time to write crap like this?
haha...nah. All these are just my imagination. This is only what
I think.What does God think leh?
It's all about Jesus
It's all about the way He changed our lives
It's all about Jesus
The power of His blood can't be denied.
We lift our hearts to him
He is the reason that we sing
yes, it's all about Jesus, all about God. Yet for me, for the past few days, it has been hard.
I hadn't been thinking much about God, much less spending time in His presence. It is something i know, yet not willing to do anything about it. It's frustrating as i think about the times when i was so filled with his presence. Now it seems, i am becoming stagnant.
I will get over this i know, dont worry about me. I guess it is a time for me to learn. To grow. To know,
It's all about Jesus.
I WAS MADE TO PRAISE YOU
I was made to praise You,
I was made to glorify Your name
In every circumstance
To find a chance to thank You
I was made to love You
I was made to worship at Your feet,
And to obey You Lord
I was made for you.
so often do we forget who we were made for..
Know that the Lord is God
It is he who made us, and we are his
We are his people, the sheep of his pasture.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name
For the Lord is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.
On 5th of Oct, while u were there, i was here...
A glimpse into social work...girls.. =)
We are gentle you know...
Trying to be funny....
Smile! how's ours?
All of us...
Formation of Mili's name. M-I-L-I. cool rite?
Cool rite?
God here refers to God, as in Christianity.
if you have always wondered why God allow bad things to happen, or even bad things to happen to good people, perhaps reading this article
http://www.rbc.org/ds/q0106/page2.html helps.
=)
I have been happy. I am happy. and it is such a good feeling to feel happy and to be happy. Note the difference.
Trying to be funny....
Smile! how's ours?
All of us...
Formation of Mili's name. M-I-L-I. cool rite?
Cool rite?