i'm ready. to write abt the EA mission trip that i just went for. i really miss them...so much that it feels abit weird being back. it is strange isnt it? i have only been there for 2 weeks! But really miss them. When we were having the youth camps, i just felt so much burden for the youths. It was a recurring stirring in my heart that i had not sensed before. I felt so uncomfortable sensing their hearts so far away from God, seeing them not living to their fullest potential in Christ. It pains my heart to see and sense their desert dry condition. I am also touched by the love of the body of Christ for each of us who are strangers in a foreign land. The Ah Yi(s) and Shu Shu(s) are so warm- always making that we are well fed, attended to and comfortably settled. We barely knew them...yet they make us feel so at home. i missed the Ah Yi(s) and Shu Shu(s)!
When i was there, i missed home alot. esp when i was aching all over and was exhausted...i missed my bed so much! i missed the comforts of living in Sg. i missed my friends. i missed everything i am familiar with back home.
some dreadful stats:
as matters of fact, ..the less than desirable living conditions there made me realise yes humans are highy adaptable and that we WONt die with our so-called comforts or even necessities la. i survived without my bottle of insect repellent (it was confiscated at the trains customs), we survived thou we din get to bathe for 12 whole days, survive without washing hair for 2 or 3 days, survived wearing the same clothes for 4-5 consecutive days, survived after using the awful smelly and worms infected poo-poo hole, survived after drinking white powdery water (their tap water). we SURVIVED. dont call us survivors cos if u asked anyone of us, we would tell u none of us would be able to survive if we depended on ourselves. We survived on the grace of God and by the grace of God! His grace is sufficient for us. God is good to us. I did not get bitten by any mosquitoes or sandflies! I think none of us did! None of us fell sick during this trip! All of us coped well to the food and different weather. Praise God!
yes we had a few scary experiences of losing one another (catching the train and on taxis), but i guess God wanted to strengthen our faith and trust in Him. Everything turned out fine in the end. So i guess we should not dwell too much in that but to look at the bigger picture. Yes i think all of us are still guessing why God allow such scary expereinces to happen to us, but no matter what, let's keep in mind- God already has the final victory! Guess God is teaching us to trust in Him and not in what we see.
I know i (we) was there for God's purpose. and i was there to accomplish that purpose, so i chose to focus on accomplishing that purpose. So,I made up my mind to cast out any thoughts that told me otherwise, bcos i was very sure God had his purposes for having us there. Indeed as I (we) learnt after this trip..i believe all of us felt the same way. Praise God and all glory to Him!
When i saw the church there, my heart goes out to them. I am encouraged by their fearless faith and passion to serve God. Being a Christian in China is difficult and dangerous. The Holy Spirit moved my heart deeply when i prayed for the adult believers. I knew they faced many dangers for their faith, i prayed they will stand strong and by the grace of God, they will stand firm till the end!
I am burdened for the youths there who had not experienced God personally. I was helpless when i saw youths not reaching their fullest potential in Christ. I was very disturbed during worship when i saw no hands raised, no desire to get into the presence of God and no move of the Holy Spirit.
there were 2 boys in my small group who left deep impressions on me. they showed no interest in the discussions nor programs, fell asleep during sermons and worst, they went to bully another younger boy in the same group! as one of their "lao shi" and one of the leaders, i did not know what to do with them! I felt so helpless ...that after i knew they bullied the younger boy, i could only went into my room and sob..tears just rolled down my eyes..i interceded right there in the room for them...i sensed that they had so much potential in them that God can use. yet such an incident was robbing them of the potential and good future they have in Christ! why? it was such an emo time for me as i sat there sobbing and interceding for them. i asked God to intervene. They have so much more in Christ! it is saddening to see them waste it away!
that was on the 2nd day of the camp.
on the last day of the camp...i know if there was a more suitable time to talk to the boys, it was now or never. but i don't know what to say to them! What should i say?How should i say? Would i say the right things? the next thing i knew, one of the local leaders signalled for me to talk to one of the boys. I was caught by surprise and asked why, but what he said to me next was more shocking.
"He(the boy) wants to enrol in Bible school."
my mind went "WHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? Did i hear right?"
when i came near to the boy, he was lying on the bench and was in tears. I dunno what had caused that outburst. My heart just went out to him and suddenly what i needed to say to him became clear to me. i shared with him how i cried for them and why. I shared with him that i knew he had so mcuh potential in Christ and told him not to waste it. I saw that he understood what i was talking about. Then i started to pray for him. As i prayed for him, i sensed God had began His work in him and he has finally experienced God, and drew near to God. I sensed that the Holy Spirit had began to touch his heart and work in this boy's life. I was filled with much relief and comfort that finally, this boy found God and was once reconciled again back to God. Praise God! No toughies is hard for God. No heart is too cold for Jesus to enter. I am so happy for this boy....He found true love, acceptance and hope in Jesus. It is such a beautiful feeling to be part of this, seeing how God move and work in the hearts of the young people.
seeing how God moved and worked in the hearts and lives of the youths touched me greatly. it showed me how MUCH these youths need God in their lives and how MUCH God desires to draw near to each of them- to fill them with His love, grace, acceptance and hope.
this mission trip is another experience that i would not trade for anything else.
God has shown me His love for His beloved precious young people.
How can i (you) not be moved?
Lets be moved to action shall we?
Lets bring Jesus everywhere we go because everyone needs Him.
Father, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
