just read Esther's blog. and how i identify with what she wrote.
recently, i feel that i am lacking something in my life but i dunno what. and bcos of that, i have been thinking...
what is it, that i lack?
Money? well, yes.
Friends? not really.
Love of family? perhaps, but i know they care.
Intellect? hmmm...i'd rather be dumb at times.
Clothes? SHoes? Bags? hmmm...wont hurt to have more. =)
A boyfriend? that would be what my friends say....
and I have been thinking...
and I think what I really lack is what this world lacks.
I lack what man lacks.
I lack what man cannot give.
and that's God's love.
Yet, i also know, what i lack, someone may not recognise.--------------------------------
I think i lack God's love, not bcos i think that God does not love me.
but bcos i felt that God's love is lacking in my life.
and bcos of that, i find it hard to love others.
i want to shut off from so many people. not that i hate/ dislike them.
but simply cos, i find it hard to love them.
and they say, love is an act of will.
i feel that love, other than God's, would be hard to satisfy me.
yes, i am getting cynical, critical of man.
i'm making things hard for myself.
quite sick of all that i am getting, of all i am feeling, of all i am supposed to be.
